I’m going to Hell with the gays. Yay!

We had our realtor over last night to discuss the final things that need to be done to our house before closing. He’s a fairly nice guy, and very eager to just be done with the house, so he agreed to everything we said.

The funny part happened when my 5 year old son walked past, with his blue toenails. Mr. Realtor said, “Hey, you’ve got blue toenails!” I told him that my boys love painting their toenails, and he grimaced, and said, “They’ll get over that.”

I thought, “I hope not!” but said, “Well, my brother, who is 27, still paints his toenails.” And my husband mentioned that my brother is gay.

Mr. Realtor frowned, and said he had a gay brother too. He then explained how he had “laid it down” for his brother, and told him, “You know I love you, but you’re going to Hell. You’re just going to Hell.” He then told us that he wouldn’t normally talk about this with customers, but knowing our background…

I was shocked, but willing to move back to talking about the house. My sweet husband, however, had the guts to disagree with Mr. Realtor. He plainly explained how he believed that, whatever people’s challenges in this life, we will be judged according to our capabilities, and mercy will be able to mitigate our circumstances. Mr. Realtor, a Born-Again Christian, disagreed. He believes strongly that when you cross the line, you are plain and simply going to Hell. I tried to tell him that if you continue to love and accept a person who has done things you don’t agree with, that person is more likely to come around to your view than if you condemn them or disown them, but I don’t think he agreed with that either.

My husband kept trying for a while, and insisted that there wasn’t a one-size-fits-all ruler for judging all humans. It didn’t work, but there was no contention. After Mr. Realtor had left, we talked about how, in Mr. Realtor’s view, we were probably going to Hell too, since we’re Mormons. Ah, well.


~ by woundedhart on October 4, 2007.

8 Responses to “I’m going to Hell with the gays. Yay!”

  1. Personally, I think realtors are going to hell. Even if they don’t paint their toenails. I know, I know, they claim they can’t help it–they were just born that way–but I don’t buy it. Realty is just against God’s plan.

  2. I decided awhile back that hell sounds like a much funner place than heaven anyways, so I don’t mind so much that I’m headed there anymore… 🙂

  3. i’d much rather be in hell with you than in heaven with that guy. i never thought that having babies all throughout eternity while my husband creates planets and stuff sounded all that great anyway.

  4. Ungewiss, I don’t know if I want to be there, if the realtors will be there too. 🙂

    Jana, can I come to your party?

    Chandelle, I think the having babies is going to be happening in Hell. In my heaven, I’m not havin’ no babies, and I’m for sure gonna be making the planets.

  5. This post reminded me of the boy on my high school swim team who showed up for the first practice with pink polka-dotted toenails. (His little niece had painted them) Maybe in high school you can only get away with this if you are actually gay or if you are 6’2”, buff and stronger than any of the football players. Which he was. But it is encouraging that toenail polish is now being worn by high school boys. As well as your boys. In my religion, Moms who let their boys wear pink footie pajamas (yes, I have pictures) or blue nail polish get a special dispensation in heaven for having as few or as many spirit children as they desire.

  6. I am continually amazed when I come across evangelicals praising “the Good News” when what they mean is that they believe in a God who will condemn people to eternal torment simply for believing the wrong things about the nature of God.

    I don’t believe in the Mormon cosmology, either, but it’s a universalist faith where even the wicked and misguided will have a degree of happiness in the next world. In that regard, it’s a very humanist and humane religion.

  7. You’re all invited to a PARTY!

    Where: Chez Jana, 666 Outer Darkness Lane.
    When: Soon, but not too soon.
    What to bring: It’s potluck–I’m making a big schadenfreude pie. I’ll also be brewing up a big pot of tea and a pitcher of margaritas (both virgin and non). 😉

  8. I’m a little late to the party here, but I’d like to chime in anyway. I very much admire the way your husband stood up to the realtor. In similar circumstances, I’ve too often written off expressing my own opinion on the grounds it’s not going to make a difference in anyone’s thinking anyway. That’s been my position for years. But I’m beginning to see that unless we talk back to bigots the bigots will do all our talking for us, and nothing will ever change.

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